We are all trying to do our best, and be the best mothers we can be. But sometimes, it’s just about getting to the end of the day alive – right?! So here are some of my not-so-perfect mum confessions… I’m sure you can secretly relate to a few! (Or I’m just a really crappy mum)
1. Selfish Mum Confessions
I didn’t take my daughter to her swimming lesson because it was cold and I didn’t want to get in the pool myself.
2. Running Away To Maccas
Sometimes I fantasise about getting in my car and running away – or at least going to get McNuggets.
3. What Poo?
I smelt poo, but I waited till my husband noticed it so I didn’t have to change it.
I feed the baby packet puree because I didn’t have time/couldn’t be bothered making it.
5. Forcing Sleep
I gave my toddler Phenergan on the plane so she would sleep the whole flight (it was awesome).
6. Spew Schmew
I leave the house with spew on my shoulders because I figure it’s just going to get spewed on again anyway.
7. Daycare Always Wins
I dropped my toddler off at daycare without breakfast because I was late for work and I knew they would feed her.
8. Rushing Doesn’t Always Win
I accidentally clipped my babies finger when cutting her nails and made it bleed (I was pretty upset about this one).
9. Little White Lies
I told my daughter her annoying phone toy was broken when really I just removed the batteries.
10. Forcing Naps
I force the kids to take a nap at midday so I can watch Ellen in peace.
11. Lazy Cooking
I fed my kid’s baked beans for dinner because there was nothing ‘easy’ in the house to cook.
12. Skipping Pages
I skip pages in the book when reading to my kids at bedtime.
13. Kids Are The Best Excuse
I use my kids to get out of social engagements all the time.“Sorry babe, the babies really sick so we’re gonna stay home.”
I claim my forgetfulness is because I had a shit night sleep, but really my kids slept through, I just suck at remembering things.
15. It Never Happened
I put the baby down crying, then walked out of the room and shut the door to save my sanity.
16. Anything To Keep The Peace
I let my toddler eat from the bag of grapes while we’re shopping just to keep her quiet.
17. Please Hubby?
I claimed the kids were high maintenance and crying all day just so I didn’t have to cook dinner.
18. MIL’s Are The Best
I ask my MIL to ‘watch the kids for an hour’ but then come back in three.
19. Driveway Time
When I pull up in the driveway, I sit in the car for ages with the kids strapped in just so I can reply to texts/make phone calls/Snapchat/check Instagram.
20. Wine Allowance
I have a ‘wine allowance’ in our weekly shopping budget.