When Annabelle was little, she was a total milestone champion! She threw us her first smiles at like four weeks, rolled over about eleven weeks and was an early walker around ten months!
Yup, she could totally participate in the baby Olympic decathlon of milestones or some shit – and I, as her mother, would have been some pushy sports mum living vicariously through her child, bragging about her every win!
Yes, I admit it – I was a total baby bragger!
Fast forward about three years, and here I am! The mum of a little girl with a speech delay due to hearing problems, which she needed grommets to fix and a baby who is THAT far off hitting her so-called milestones at the ‘correct’ time (we call her our little potato ha)!
I must admit, that I’m glad I guess it happened this way around, and that I didn’t experience the extreme paranoia perhaps some first time parents do when their babies don’t hit milestones! But I can guarantee you it doesn’t stop you worrying and stressing perhaps something is wrong or that you need intervention to help. It doesn’t stop you comparing, even though you know no two babies are the same!
Yes, babies all develop at different ages and absolutely we should celebrate all our children’s milestones (no matter how early or late), but it doesn’t help when you see little Timmy, who is a month younger than your babe, is sitting up and your little cherub still just flops over herself and face plants the ground.
It’s hard not to compare when your almost three-year-old isn’t toilet trained yet because she doesn’t quite understand yet and still struggles with her speech. Yet so many of the kids from day-care or mums group with kids the same age or younger are and always ask you “how’s toilet training going” when they see her in a nappy still!
And it absolutely is NOT okay when someone uses your child’s setbacks against them as in insult, in a mean and malicious way (yes, sadly I’ve had that happen)! It’s a sure fire way to piss off any mama bear!
All I can say is that bloody wonder weeks app can shit off! I am fast learning that there is no textbook baby, each babe develops at their own rate, and these ‘so-called’ milestones can be complete bogus and a cause for unnecessary stress and worry!
Just because an app or a book says so, doesn’t make it gospel! If your maternal health nurse or doctors not concerned, then neither should you. And should something be wrong or you need intervention, then you will cross that bridge when you come to it, not be afraid to talk about it and never be ashamed of it!
Does anyone else have milestone paranoia? Have you ever compared your children to others? Or has anyone else ever been a baby-bragger?